Shame

So i've been reading this book and checking out Brene Brown's posts and podcasts as we all read together.  i've discovered a few things about myself while working through some of the chapters.

i withdraw and disconnect when i feel shame

i appease and please to earn connection

i rarely get aggressive or use shame to fight shame (see #1)

i feel shame about my body-i feel shame about my success-i feel shame when i gossip(which is not often)or am judgmental-i feel shame when i stand by/hear others gossip or be judgmental-

i feel shame when fear takes over-i feel shame when i eat instead of take action

i have perfectionism issues which are both good and bad - they have helped me get to where i am today which is a good place but keep me from facing the truth sometimes.  denial - it's just not cutting it anymore. be brave.  face the fear.

i want to live an authentic, loving, connected, truth filled, life - brave in love, brave in fear.

i feel shame when i am criticized or i make a mistake

i feel shame when others tell me about their shame because i have major perfectionism issues so it brings up a whole swell of oh shit they are telling me they are not perfect and oh shit we have to be perfect because if we aren't, well then no one loves us and there will be hell to pay. 

i'm a good listener and when the shame doesn't fog me in i am empathic.  when it does roll in, i still heard you but i want to 'fix it'.

i feel shame when i think that my perfectionism issues have gotten in the way of parenting with truth and bravery.